Some memories

Yesterday I was sitting in my car depressed in a Lowe’s parking lot

A week ago I was in my room lonely

Growing up in that room was very painful

Today got hit in the face by a log

Because I was young and dumb

I remember so much stuff and I really wish I could just forget

I wish I could just turn of the first 27 years and be who I really am

I lied to so many people

Because it was a safety mechanism

I was good at 2 facing

A month ago I was eating in chucky cheese pizza watching other kids get pretty much a whole package deal

I fought for simple things

I got in trouble

I sat at the table every night just to be reprimanded for some weird thing I did

Every night we sat as a family

Sure as fuck didn’t act like a family though

Being the oldest I was the problem and the test

That is pretty damn clear

Being the test hurt more than getting hit by a freight train

Not fucking kidding

If you gonna decide to have kids fucking let them live how they want

I was pressured I still remember every time my dad would pressure me

I remember all the times my mom was quiet

I was a test and it fucking hurt

The sexual predator of the family is the angle

He’s been forgivin and shit

I write this out because my memory needs to come out some how

I need to share

I haven’t been able to genuinely share


This life is so hard

Non of us decided to be born

Instead we where forced out and

Told to live a certain way

Well maybe that god damn way is just a choice

Don’t we get choices

It’s not just black and white

It’s grey

Closing a person in on one thing

And telling them it’s the way

Without giving them autonomy

Giving No space to question

Just making them your slave

They are slowly dying

They feel like there is no hope anymore

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My name is Sasha Adele Braden, a transgender woman, who is queer and living in freedom. I knew I was transgender at the age of five because my development just seemed off so I had an inclination something was very wrong. I was locked away because of shame and I decided that I was going to take my truth to the grave and never open up to anyone because I was full of fear. That all changed February 14, 2018, when it all came out. I’m free. I’m alive. I’m learning that life isn’t just eating, sleeping, having sex, and going to the bathroom but it is so much more! Learning that has been a blast! I am also co-managing a grassroots organization called, “REFLECT” and it is all about trans and nonbinary expression through community while being able to completely lean on allies. I am super stoked to be doing this and being a safe place for the queer community of Austin, TX. Look up my Facebook page “REFLECT” for more details. With all of that said, welcome to my life. I welcome all types of people and welcome all types of dialogue. So, drop a comment or two on a post every once In a while​ this blog is mainly just a way to let go of trauma from my past. Expressing it has helped me overcome things I thought I was never going to be able to overcome and I’m living in freedom for the first time in my life.

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