This is so hard to write because life was so hard for so long and now life had turned a new leaf and I feel incredible. I realize the last several blog posts have been dark but that is honestly where I was. Now I’m in the clouds and I don’t really know what changed? Maybe the meds are working? Maybe going out into the community more has helped? Maybe learning how to love myself a little each day has helped? Or maybe having a goal for the near future is helping. Or maybe it’s all of it?
Something clicked last Monday night 11-26-18 in my brain like a missing puzzle piece and from that moment it seems like so much just got better more and more each day. I stopped worrying and chose to enjoy the little wins I have every day. I began noticing the little changes happening not only on my outside physical body but also inside. The only way I know how to describe this is a puzzle piece so huge got attached and gave me so much hope.
So much happened last week that where major wins also like getting set up with medical/dental insurance, getting 3/4 of my name change process done, and making a few new friends. Last week was seriously the best week I have had since I moved to Austin and I feel like the more I choose to focus on the good this is just going to continue getting better and better. Today I get to go and get resources to get my name and gender marker changed pro bono which is huge because that costs upwards of $400. I could get it changed today but I am missing three things which is ok because I can get those things next week. This name change thing is what was keeping me awake and making me crazy because of trumps bull of wanting to get rid of trans folks. That day was rough and it just got harder each day till I got sick and was forced to sleep. But, here I am extreamly close to getting these things changed and I am stoked!